Men: Oh my God! You’re one of those Feminazi types? I must think twice before I speak in front of you.

Me: * eye roll and a sarcastic comment *

I am a feminist, and a very proud one at that. Also, I think everyone should be a feminist. However, I don’t impose my thoughts on anyone because I support the right to choice. But some choices are just wrong, you know! For example, the choice to discriminate human beings based on their gender or race or religion or appearance or economic status or sexual orientation (Actually, the choice to discriminate, overall). I am not supportive of these choices. This is why I am a feminist, – because I believe everyone is, and deserves to be treated as an equal citizen of this globalized world, no matter what gender you are, who you choose as a life partner, what religion you follow, how much you earn, you deserve equality and you have the right to equality. It is as simple as that. I don’t hate men. I am not an angry activist who wants women to rule over the world (the angry part, it comes and goes but okay), I am not a lesbian (although it would be pretty cool if I was!), but I am straight and I am not seeking for your attention with my opinions (or maybe I am), I actually like having all the attention to myself but no, me being a feminist has nothing to do with that.

I didn’t call myself a feminist until a few years back even though, my thoughts about the unequal society has always been the same. The only change that has come is in the refinement of the thoughts and how I articulate it. Despite of that, I could not get myself to call myself a feminist. Why, you may ask! Because I did not want this tag of ‘feminism’ to be associated with me. Mostly because  I live in the kind of society that i) does not have proper knowledge of feminism and ii) only looks at feminism from a negative light. Whenever I would bring up the ‘F’ word in family gatherings or within my friend circle, I always got into a lot of discussions and I did not like it when my beliefs were constantly questioned. Things are very different now, and I very proudly call myself a feminist. And boy do I get into more discussions than ever! But now, I enjoy the discussions. Mostly because it gives me a lot of content (like this one!).

My biggest problem with people having a problem with feminism is that they only have problem with feminism. If the people who called out feminists were the same people who called out sexists, then I promise you, I would happily take on the trolls on feminism. I don’t even care about what you call yourself if you treat everyone equally. Because that is the whole point. But people are absolutely fine when there is misogyny is all over the society but there suddenly have a problem when a ‘feminist’ speaks up about gender equality.  A few months back, a very good friend of mine mentioned me in a post that had a picture of a man holding a baby and standing in a bus where there were no empty seats. And the post basically said, ‘if it was a woman instead of that man, the feminists would be so angry’. I did not respond to the post. To be honest, I was tired of this misconception and I did not want to justify myself or the belief that I stand for. I mean, isn’t it common sense? or let’s say, isn’t it humanity that if a person is with a baby and there are no empty seats in a vehicle, you either offer to carry the baby or you offer the seat? How is it my fault that there was no one with humanity in that bus? Do you have to call out feminism?

 Don’t call out the feminists, call out the sexists and maybe then feminism won’t have to exist.

Most of the time when I tell people that I am a feminist and I am against the patriarchy (wait, shouldn’t we all be against patriarchy?), people assume that I am the kind of person who supports women rulers and women being in power. Actually yes, I do want women to be in power and I want men to have power and I also want the trans people to have power – the power to make change happen and the power to voice their ideas and be a part of the decision making table. I don’t want women to rule over the world. Actually, I don’t want rulers. Why do we even need rulers? When I say I am against patriarchy, it doesn’t mean I support matriarchy. I don’t think matriarchy is any better than patriarchy. I am a strong believer of the Marxist concept that ‘oppressed are the biggest oppressor’. And it is centuries of oppression that women have faced and I think if suddenly the entire power was given in the hands of women, there is a high chance, they will take full advantage of it and it will just be the establishment of another unequal system. So all hail equality!

As Kamla Bhasin says, “The opposite of patriarchy is not matriarchy. The opposite of both matriarchy and patriarchy is equality.”

I am a feminist. I don’t believe women are superior. I believe everyone is equal. I believe that everyone should get equal opportunities and rights. What I am against is the inequality and as long as that exists, no matter how tired I am of discussions, I will keep voicing my opinion against it. I think everyone can be a feminist and everyone should be a feminist despite their gender or race or age or whatever. There is no one particular model of how a feminist should be. So yes, misogyny, I am a feminist.